The Perils of Mimicking Someone’s Success!

“We’re here to put a dent in the universe.” – Steve Jobs, entrepreneur and inventor (1955-2011)

Some of my clients come to me asking for advice on how to be like someone they know, who has gone to become “successful.” Also, when I ask them what direction they want to take in their career, they often respond by saying, my father wants me to be a like Jim Smith, who is a successful architect, or like Sally Jones, who became a star attorney, etc. Yet, when I ask them what they want to do, I get a blank look. I find this very puzzling, because I do not know the circumstances under which their role model that they plan to mimic became successful. I also do not know if their parents or those asking them to follow a certain career path are goading them to carry out their own vicarious wish.

Secondly, even if I knew all that there was to know about that person they wish to mimic and their success, I would not advice my clients to exactly follow the path of their role model. Although there is nothing wrong with deriving inspiration from someone, who has gone on to epitomize what you aspire, to mimic someone’s success is a misguided notion.

Why?

Each one of us is unique, and each one of us embodies gifts that are our own. We are given these gifts to harness them, and to achieve something that is unique to our gifts. We are also destined to seek our own unique path. By succumbing to our temptation to mimic someone, just because they are successful in our eyes, we are resigning to leading a life that is not ours, and are surrendering to a life that is not as rich as it could be. So, what do we need to do to lead a life that is our own?

1. If someone inspires you by their accomplishments, and you wish to pursue what they went on to accomplish, find out what they are doing (or did) to be rewarded with that success, rather than merely imitating how they did what they did.
2. Instead of merely following their path with a desire to become someone you admire, chart out your own path and conquer your own quests. In the process you will discover who you are, and find new untapped inspiration to continue on your path.
3. Connect with the person you admire and derive inspiration from them. If that person is no more, learn about them through their writings, works, and those whom they touched.
4. Remember, even the person, who went on to accomplish their original quest cannot often beat or even repeat that success, because it is impossible to replicate an inspired creation. This is why second acts, even by the most celebrated achievers, often fail to make the impact of their original feats!
5. Do not be afraid to fail, but do not focus on the failure. If you plan, apply your gifts to the cause at hand, and stay focused on your purpose, any “failure” you encounter will only advance your resolve.
6. Discover your gifts as you pursue your own path and then use those gifts to further your quest. In this quest you will find your own gifts becoming even more valued as you advance your journey.
7. As the late Steve Jobs said in his 2005 Stanford commencement address, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other people drown out your inner voice. And, most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. Stay hungry, stay foolish!”

Good luck!