I have many clients who come to me when they feel stuck in their jobs. They are impatient to take on another, more challenging job, both inside their own company and out, to move up in their career. When I explore further, I inevitably find that their main source of unhappiness lies in how their organization, including their manager, is treating them and that they are running out of patience. This sense of impatience exacerbates when their manager repeatedly tells them to wait for the next opportunity or that promotion that is going to open up for them. Most managers admonish their employees to defer their unhappiness and to be patient with what is coming to them!
This blog upends that admonition and makes a case for you to be happy where you are, but to be impatient about the change that you want to make, first starting with yourself!
In this context one of my clients recently came to see me and to tell me how bad her manager was and how there was no growth opportunity in her group. She also surmised that despite being a part of a high-visibility group at this blockbuster company, there was no place to grow. Her company had broken every sales record in the past decade and its stock had taken an over twenty-fold hike in the same period.
After exploring further we both quickly realized that the change that she was seeking was not needed from the outside (a promotion, a new assignment, new co-workers), but from within her own self. This is where one of the Gandhi’s famous quotes about change hits home, Be the change in the world that you wish to see!
Within the span of our session we both realized that, yes, she was getting bored with her routine at work and not having any challenges to conquer in the way her work was structured. Her boss, who was a strict command-and-control micro-manager, further compounded this. So, she started losing patience and was increasingly feeling unhappy about her job and about her overall situation. She was beginning to question her career choice.
After some discussion we agreed that if she now made a change to her external environment (new job, new assignment, new boss) then she is likely to repeat this pattern after that new environment became a routine once again, just as the current one did. Without changing her basic view of how she deals with her environment and reframing it, we both agreed that there was no sense in making a change in her external environment. So, we agreed to the following plan, which was both practical and was driven by her own desire to change, not by some outside agent that would want her to be patient to see that change. The strategy was to create and find happiness within her own environment by making a change, but to make the necessary change on her own terms, not someone else’s:
- Identify top three development needs that she could pursue on her own to improve her overall effectiveness as a professional, who is getting ready for a higher leadership responsibility. She identified those three areas as: Better communication, improving her own work environment, and connecting with new people.
- For improving her communication she agreed to join the local Toastmasters club and actively participate to learn good communication skills.
- For improving her work environment, she agreed to make a list of special projects that would help those working in her group to improve their productivity and output. She was confident that once her manager saw that list that he would suggest the priorities in which she should prosecute those projects and support her pursuits. Since this was work beyond her assigned duties, she could pace it as time allowed and as her own interests drove the effort.
- Since she felt stagnant with the friends that surrounded her, she agreed to make new friends by frequently visiting the company cafeteria during lunch, instead of eating alone every day at her desk. She also agreed to be open to connecting with those attending her Toastmasters group to expand her circle of friends.
- Start writing stories of her accomplishments for her résumé to realize how much she had contributed to the success of her team and her organization. Her current résumé showed many bullets in a very dry, factual, and transactional way. They lacked any juicy story that excited and intrigued its reader. By moving the focus from writing a one-line bullet for each task, to writing a short story (3-4 lines of leadership narrative) would create a new energy around her message. Having such a résumé would invigorate her to undertake even bigger tasks to pursue what is listed in #1b, above. These tasks would now also provide further ammunition for her résumé, making it even more powerful.
- Change the mode of working on a task in her current role from mere order taking to proactively seeking the assignments that added value to her organization. This was going to require more insight and initiative, but she agreed to this mode of taking on new tasks.
- Provide mentoring and guidance to those in her group that would benefit from it. Even though she had no one reporting to her, her natural inclination was to share her expertise and to make things better; the very reason she came to seek my advice. Taking that a step further, if she could mentor more junior members in her team her role would become more valuable to the manager, the team, and the organization.
- Send emails to the manager reporting the progress on special projects and seeking his guidance in critical areas. This would keep her both visible to her manager and on a growth track.
We often surrender our plight to many external forces as this client did. If she had changed her job or transferred to another group or company, without making the changes to her own style of working, in just a few years, we could have had another conversation, very similar to the one that started this chain, because nothing fundamentally was changed. When you start the change from within, the change you really seek comes naturally and a lot sooner than you realize. Here, now, you are in charge!
So, find happiness where you are and be impatient with the rate of change, by first starting the change within yourself.
Good luck!